this entry NOT laced with anthrax.

free thought and word association games for the retarded. self-fulfilling, I feel disgusted by ego. it was written down somewhere. A pen, a thought, here, go play. scattered stuttering, I, I, I, so now it's gone for the idiots to tackle.

the
the
the

it's so uncommon, eff. effervescent cough cough simplicity, say it too many times. my foot burns.

rough monies sketched out on acid-dried blue print paper. under a steel beast, I was cut off. They say he's from Yemen, they say he's from nebraska.

seven students charged in high school brawl, hospitalized target. seven students. seventh song playing on cd. Quit smoking last friday, seven days, no cigarettes.

there was a pause, and I thought. picturesque, purrt-pretty. See them remove their veils, see them cut their beards. revolutionary counter oppression, stomped down by mightly lack luster fierce--- I don't want to say... this force, this force, it ruins your blood. over and over again, sometimes, I need to stop.

remember the ones who died. remember the ones who will die. remember how it all started, don't get lost in coffee cups and CNN. America strikes back.

A Montgomery Township man
now faces first-degree murder charges in his baby's death. B2

we spend our lives trying to figure out what everyone else is saying. self-loathing, a common subject. blood on my hand, skin shredded. tiny cut, deep red. cardboard diced the skin between my thumb and index finger. I squeezed the blood out, watched it turn red. Stung, burned. Left it alone, let it dry. Natural processes, take time, and hurt the ones you love.

calm returns to my pillow, slowly turn invisible. looks like another free moment, looks like another storm at the end of the hallway. turn the light on, let the thoughts see themselves. slam the door, you fool, you can't love her anymore. Shadows and broken light bulbs, now you're blind, now you're blind. let them sing it for you, they know all the words.

did'nt you forget to stand when you were a child? Didn't you forget to sing the national anthem? your country you disgraced, all for your god. do I now disgrace my god, all for my country? We'll never know. agnosticism.

Didn't you do something wrong? my atonement, where is it? I'd like to wear it like an after shave, over top raw skin, over top fresh deep razor blade cuts. over top pleasantries, and thuding, thudding, thud thud thud. No regrets, sorrow is acceptance of my actions. Pleasure, pain, sorrow, guilt, joyous gratification, happiness is only in how you perceive the experience, not in the experience itself.

if I stare for too long, at a single light, too late, it's all slipping away into useless, wasteful words.